The Spirit of the Lord GOD is upon Me...
To comfort all who mourn, To console those who mourn in Zion,
To give them beauty for ashes, The oil of joy for mourning,
The garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness;
That they may be called trees of righteousness,
The planting of the LORD, that He may be glorified."

Isaiah 61:1,2c,3 (New King James Version)

Friday, June 18, 2010

Courage, Strength, Stick-to-itiveness

We are approaching four months, of a nightmare, of incredible growth, and sorrowful defeat. Next week, Colt will plead guilty to involuntary manslaughter and face a sentencing of probation to ten years in prison, I pray for mercy.

Today, I try to recount what I have overcome with the grace of God. I’m searching DEEP to find strength of some of that “stick-to-itiveness” I used to pride myself on. As I have said before, I called on the Lord that morning on my knees in front of 808 Warbler Court, Psalms 138:3 says “In the day that I called, you answered me. You encouraged me with strength in my soul.” I have felt that strength since, some days it is minimal but it’s still there…I feel it’s waning today, but I feel that I have not fed myself with the scripture and prayer that I truly need to rely on at this time. It takes courage to give it up to God, to put worldly troubles into the hands and trust of someone, we are simply asked to believe in and serve in order to receive everlasting life. It’s a pretty extreme yet outwardly simple endeavor.

In the book of Hebrews, it is written “(Hebrews 13:6) 6 So that with good courage we say, “The Lord is my helper. I will not fear. What can man do to me?” Well, the truth is Man CAN do a lot. Man with God or Satan will impact your days for your entire life, but it’s up to your trust in God on how that impact will ring. That is where we go back to the idea of courage. Courage in fear can ONLY result as trusting 110% in what you believe in. But God prepared us for these struggles, he gave us role models to learn from, and he developed in us a triumphant spirit if t we choose to pursue a life following the model of Jesus Christ, II Timothy explains that “(II Timothy 1:7) 7 God didn’t give us a spirit of fear, but of power, love, and self-control.” I need to rely on my God given spirit to overcome worldly struggles and continue on my purpose, everyone does. Everyone daily will walk a hard walk in varying degrees of difficulty, but everyone struggles, everyone chooses to have the courage to trust what they believe in or abandon it and feel they can do it on their own.

Today is a struggle. Today, I wonder what else is in store but afraid to ask the question out loud. Today, I pray to God to recognize that “My soul is weary with sorrow: (and to) strengthen me according to your word. (Psalms 119:28)”

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