Toughest.Pill.EVER.To. Swallow. Hands down. When I question my faith I see it literally - like when I wonder IF God exist, but then it sneaks in too - when I wonder why I am where I am. Accepting, that God's plan is bigger, better, and far more purposeful than my own ideals has TRULY expedited my spiritual growth from a Sunday Christian to a follower of Christ. Today, I look at my life and see things coming into line. Continually, greatful and thankful to God for all he has given me. Why do I accept his path when my percieved needs are fullfilled, and foresake his love when I feel like I'm falling hard? Ironically, it's an easy answer. I am selfish. I'm stuck in my own little "Me Bubble" as Pastor Matt would say. I WANT OUT. THIS is my prayer. That I can look at my life, then look to my God to bless me with sturdy footing on the narrow road I choose. I also pray, that I learn to balance my blessings on earth with my duty to God and be greatful for both.
Recently, I have made a new friend. Unexpectedly, this friend has taught me a lot in a short amount of time. I truly believe my friend was handpicked by God, to show me that the world outside my Me Bubble is full of blessings that are untouchable by the monetary and physical losses I have so far recieved in my life. That I can be greatful for today and not overly eager for what to tomorrow will bring. This isn't to say that I have settled. But to take today for what today is, each morning I wake up. Embrace it, live it, and USE it to fulfill my purpose.
God is truly love, let me be a vessel.
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